Foundations of Prayer

"Prayer is both a gift of grace and a determined response on our part.  It always presupposes effort."
 -Catechism of the Catholic Church, 2725.
 

Three Keys to Prayer

1.God alone satisfies!

Why would I want to spend time with the man or woman I love?  Because love seeks union with the beloved.

Though we may not have experienced the joy of union with God - he is infinitely more fulfilling than any human beloved. He does not give us the joy, consolation or pleasure of union with him at first because he is testing us to see if we love him of just the good things we get from him. The joy, consolation and pleasure will come after the test.

If we give our time to things of this world and not to him we are choosing ourselves over him.

2.There is no such thing as Fate.

We can't understand prayer apart from the truth that this is a family. God is our Father and through grace we become his children.

We are called to share in the work of our Father. In his family he wills that his children participate consciously and freely in his great work bringing creation and redemption to completion.

Created in the image and likeness of God, He has given man intelligence,freedom and responsibility.

We must determine who we become. God has placed us into our own hands so to speak. (cf. Sirach 15:14ff.)

God wants what is best for us, but he requires our participation.

There is no fate!

If we don't develop a good life of prayer, we will miss opportunities and make wrong choices. It is a cooperative effort. He will not force us to know His plan or to be obedient.

Some aspects of his plan are unchanging:

• Christ's redeeming death on the Cross.
• Peter tried to stop him, but it was against God's will.

Other events are open to change - LIKE WHO WE BECOME!
God freely opens some events in life to change that we may participate consciously and freely out of love.

Prayer:

• 1) Changes events
• 2) Changes lives
• 3) PRAYER CHANGES US!

God wants all people to be saved, yet hell exists.

3. We all want happiness

God has a perfect plan of happiness for us. But he will not force us to know or do his plan. He wants to guide us and help us through study, counsel, andabove all prayer.

Big decisions - Major, Vocation, who to date, what company to work for, city to live in? The more I follow his plan the better my life will be. Part of the script is for us to write. The problem is we fail to recognize his plan because we don't spend a good amount of time in prayer to get on the same page with God.

We pray as we live; we live as we pray (CCC 2725).

In prayer he opens our eyes to his plan for our lives and he strengthens our willto say yes to his plan.
His plan is best; it is far better than we could ever imagine.

Prayer is a Relationship With a Person

What kind of relationship with my wife would I have if I only spoke to her and listened to her as we both laid down to sleep?
Think about what it is like when you begin to date someone and you fall in love. Think of how two people pursue one another, to spend time together. You want to know everything about that person.You tell them everything about yourself.

But if you don't speak with them and stop seeking to know them:
Your love grows cold and the relationship dies.

Seek to know him, to speak to him, to listen to him, to love him!

Prayer is conversation with God

We speak with him and he speaks with us.

St. Escriva:

• "To pray is to talk with God. But about what? About him, about yourself: joys, sorrows, successes and failures, noble ambitions, daily worries, weaknesses! And acts of thanksgiving and petitions: and Love and reparation. In a word: to get to know him and to get to know yourself: to get acquainted!"

Indwelling presence - Augustine - "Late it was that I loved you O Lord."

Prayer is a gift of grace

1.     Pray for the Father to send the Holy Spirit  (Lk 11:13).
2.     Entrust oneself to Mary and ask for her maternal help.

If you do not have a great desire to pray; ask God to give you a great desire to pray. He will grant this desire. If you ask often for the desire to pray God will grant you a burning desire for prayer.

Make an appointment with God

In order to pray we must make an appointment, set aside some specific time with God to speak with him and to listen to him. If we don't set aside some time for conversation with Jesus the day will fly past and we wont do it. Set an appointment with God the night before. Then hold to that appointment the next day.  Make God your priority.

Prayer is a habit.

If you make an appointment with God and are faithful to that appointment every day over a period of time you will develop the habit of prayer that will change your life.

I don't have time to pray.

Luke 5:12-16; Luke 10:38-42, Jesus told Martha, "Martha, Martha, you are anxious and troubled about many things; one thing is needful. Mary has chosen the good portion..." "I have too much to do to spend time in prayer."  Mary took time with Jesus and was praised by him for this. 

Mother Teresa was asked how she had time to pray with all she had to do.  She responded, "I have so much to do that I cannot afford not to pray."  If we pray God will help us fulfill our responsibilities.

We cannot pray "at all times" if we do not pray at specific times, consciously willing it (CCC 2609).

Jesus prayed every day 
In the Gospels we find Jesus rising early in the morning or staying up late at night in order to spend time in conversation with his Father every day. Mt 14:23; Lk 5:16; 6:12; Mk 1:35 Jesus taught us how to live by how he lived and he lived a life of daily prayer.

When should I pray?

• First thing in the morning is best - otherwise the day will set traps and it will get too late and you will be too tired to pray well.
• If we begin the day in prayer, we lay before God all the things in which we need his help - everything. He will help you throughout the day. Remember Mother Teresa, "I have so much to do today I cannot afford to not pray."

Follow the example of Christ.  Luke 22:39 says Jesus left to make his way as usual to the Mount of Olives to pray.  Jesus made daily prayer a priority.

Where should I pray?

"When you pray, go into your room and shut the door and pray to your Father who is in secret..." -Matthew 6:6

Find a place where you can have two things:

• Solitude
• Silence

The best place of prayer is "face to face" with Jesus in the Blessed Sacrament. If you cannot pray in His physical presence - set aside a corner of your home that is your place to pray.  A comfortable chair, a crucifix, a picture of Jesus and Mary, candles, a Bible and other spiritual reading; these are important helps to prayer. A crucifix and or an icon at the back of one's desk with the chair pushed away makes a discreet altar at which to pray.

Silence!!!  Prayer comes naturally out of silence.  

Mother Teresa, "In the silence of the heart God speaks."

Distractions

1 Peter 7: "Cast all your anxieties on him, for he cares about you."

Take every worry and anxiety that comes over you when you are trying to pray, hand them over to Jesus and Mary one by one, asking them to take care of these for you, placing them in their care and trusting in their help. This frees up your mind up to speak with him and to listen to him. Just handing over your cares, worries and anxieties to Him is a great prayer in itself, plus you are employing the help of God in everything you have to do and all you are responsible for. Give each one to God at the beginning of prayer or as they pop into your mind during prayer.

Prayer is speaking and listening to God.

Speak with the Lord as you would with a friend. Tell him about everything that is going on in your life that you would like his help with.

Entrust each thing to him and his Blessed Mother. Be Specific. He will be specific with you.

God always hears and answers our prayer

Our Father knows what is best for us; at times he does not grant what we pray for because he wants to give something better. Matthew 7:7-11   Everyone who asks receives because God is our Father! St. Jerome, "It is written, to everyone who asks it will be given; so, if it is not given to you, it is not given to you because you do not ask; so ask and you will receive." But remember, when we ask, God is more concerned with our true happiness and the well being of our soul than we are. He will only do what is best for the salvation and glorification of our soul. Sometimes he wants us to grow and become more loving and more like his Son so he allows us to endure certain trials and sufferings. Think how we act as parents toward our children. Many times we say "no" to one thing in order to give the child something better.  St. Augustine, "The physician knows best what is good for the sick man.  Therefore God sometimes in mercy hears not.  The Lord often denies what we wish for, that he may give us what we would rather have in the end."

Different Forms of Prayer

Daily Mass
The greatest and most perfect prayer, intercession, worship, and thanksgiving is the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass. Go every day.

Rosary
The Rosary is a meditation on the life and teachings of Christ.  A little boy grows up to be like his father because over many years he has watched how his father lives and over time began to imitate him without even noticing. If we get to know Christ by reading Scripture and meditating on his life while praying the Rosary, Mary will cooperate with the Holy Spirit to form us as an interior reflection of Jesus.
Pray the Rosary every day either right after your spiritual reading or at a different point in the day.

Praying with Scripture
It is through the Bible that we meet the Person of Jesus Christ.  We come to learn who he is, how he lived, what he taught, what he has done for me, and it is through Scripture that I learn his plan of salvation and happiness for my life.  Reflecting on this truth allowed St. Jerome to say, "Ignorance of Scripture is ignorance of Christ." 

Vocal Prayer
Vocal Prayer, founded on the union of body and soul in human nature, associates the body with the interior prayer of the heart, following Christ's example of praying to His Father and teaching the Our Father to His disciples.

Meditation
Meditation is above all a quest. The mind seeks to understand the why and how of the Christian life, in order to adhere and respond to what the Lord is asking. The required attentiveness is difficult to sustain, we are usually helped by spiritual reading: Sacred Scripture (particularly the Gospels), holy icons, writings of the fathers, the saints and other works of spirituality, the book of our own life. It is good to meditate on the events of your life. God wants to tell you what he is doing in and with our lives. Yet, we rarely listen.

Contemplation
Contemplative prayer is the simple expression of the mystery of prayer.  It is the gaze of faith fixed on Jesus, an attentiveness to the Word of God, a silent love (CCC 2724).

Adoration
The Church and the world have a great need for Eucharistic worship.  Jesus awaits us in this sacrament of love (JPII, Dominicae cenae).  The Catholic Church offers adoration to the sacrament of the Eucharist, not only in Mass, but also outside of it, reserving the consecrated hosts with the utmostcare, exposng them to the solemn veneration of the faithful (CCC 1378).

The Immaculate Heart of Mary

Historically, devotion to the Heart of Mary grew up in parallel, but at a lesser intensity  than that of devotion to the Heart of Jesus, only starting to become more prominent during the time of St John Eudes. John Eudes was born in 1601 in Normandy, France. He entered the Congregation of the Oratory of France, founded in 1611 by Cardinal de Berulle and was ordained to the priesthood on December 20, 1625.

St. John brought people to love Christ and the Virgin Mary by speaking tirelessly about their Heart, the sign of the love God shows for us and the communion to which we are called.

To offer them liturgical worship, he composed Masses and Offices in their honor and had the first Feast of the Holy Heart of Mary celebrated on February 8, 1648, at Autun (France,) and the Feast of the Heart of Jesus celebrated on October 20, 1672.

He died on August 19, 1680 and was canonized by Pope Pius XI on May 31, 1925.

Nevertheless,  it was not until after the Apparitions at Rue du Bac concerning the "Miraculous Medal" made to Catherine Labouré in 1830, and the establishment of a society dedicated to the Immaculate Heart of Mary, at the Church of Our Lady of Victories in Paris in 1836, that this particular devotion became really well known.

Since then devotion to the Immaculate Heart of Mary, has gradually grown more widespread in the Church, particularly since the apparitions at Fatima.

The main difference between the devotions to the hearts of Jesus and Mary is that the one concerned with Jesus emphasizes his divine heart as being full of love for mankind, but with this love for the most part being ignored or rejected, while devotion to Mary's heart is essentially concerned with the love that her heart has for Jesus, for God.

Therefore, it is not an end in itself, so the love of her heart is meant to be a model for the way we should love God. The fact that her heart is immaculate, that is sinless, means that she is the only fully human person who is able to really love God in the way that he should be loved.

Honoring Mary's Immaculate Heart is really just another way of honoring Mary as the person who was chosen to be the Mother of God, recognizing her extraordinary holiness and the immense love she bestowed on Jesus as his mother, the person who was called to share in and co-operate in his redemptive sufferings.

The aim of  the devotion is to unite mankind to God through Mary's heart, and this process involves the ideas of consecration and reparation. A person is consecrated to Mary's Immaculate Heart as a way of being completely devoted to God. This involves a total gift of self, something only ultimately possible with reference to God; but Mary is our intermediary in this process of consecration.

Because of the strong analogy between Jesus and Mary, the consecration to Mary's Immaculate Heart is closely linked to the consecration to Jesus' Sacred Heart, although it is subordinate and dependent on it. That is, although the act of consecration is ultimately addressed to God, it is an act that is made through Mary.

Mary: The Mother of My Lord

"Hail, full of grace, the Lord is with you! Blessed are you among women!" Luke 1:28

Some Christians criticize the Catholic Church for elevating Mary with the title: Mother of God. They claim that this title for Mary is not found in the Bible.

Now it may be true that the Bible does not dogmatically teach Mary as the Mother of God; however, inspired by the Holy Spirit, Elizabeth refers to Mary as "the mother of my Lord":

And it came about that Elizabeth heard Mary's greeting, the baby leaped in her womb; and Elizabeth was filled with the Holy Spirit. And she cried out with a loud voice, and said, "Blessed among women are you, and blessed is the fruit of your womb! And how has it happened to me, that the mother of my Lord should come to me?" [Luke 1:41-43; NASB]

The title, lord, is generally given to the main provider. After the Babylonian captivity, Jews commonly referred to God as Lord, especially since His name, YHWH, could not be uttered. Most modern English translations of the Old Testament render the Tetragrammaton, YHWH, as LORD. Even The American Heritage Dictionary recognizes Lord (with a capital "L") as God.

The first chapter of Luke's Gospel frequently uses the title, Lord, for example: "the commandments and requirements of the Lord" [Luke 1:6], "the temple of the Lord" [Luke 1:9] and "an angel of the Lord" [Luke 1:11]. This title exclusively refers to God. It would be quite strange if "Lord" in Luke 1:43 would be an exception.

One may argue that Elizabeth uses the phrase "my Lord" instead of "the Lord", so it means something else. This argument is weak at best. Elizabeth as a devout Jew recognized God as her Lord. The psalmists refer to God as "my God" and "my Lord" as in Psalm 35(34):23.

Matthew's Gospel also supports Mary as the Mother of God. In the first chapter, Mary's Child is said to be conceived by the Holy Spirit:

... for that which has been conceived in her is of the Holy Spirit. [Matt 1:20; also see 18]

This is definitely not a pregnancy conceived by normal means [Matt 1:23]. In the second chapter, the three Magi come to see the Christ Child:

And they came into the house and saw the Child with Mary His mother; and they fell down and worshiped Him. [Matt 2:11]

Now the Magi were pagans; however, it is difficult to believe that St. Matthew would record their worship of the Child in such a positive manner, if Mary's Child was not God. If Mary is not the Mother of God, then the Bible in this verse would condone idolatry.

Nestorius, the patriarch of Constantinople, in 428 A.D. declared that Mary could not be the Mother of God, since a creature could not bear the Creator. Later he also denied the Christ Child as God, since God could never be a helpless infant. Taking this faulty line of reasoning further, one must ask whether God really could suffer and shed His Blood on the Cross for our sins. The fundamental problem with Nestorius is that he did not completely accept the Incarnation [Galatians 4:4].

Even today some Christians claim that Mary was only the mother of Christ's human nature. This sounds plausible until one realizes the fact that a mother gives birth to a person and not a nature. When a woman gives birth to only nature, it is called a stillbirth.

Mary is not divine. Since God created her, she did not exist before God; however, as the Worthy Vessel (made worthy by God), she gave birth to the living Person, Jesus Christ. She gave birth to the Second Person of the Holy Trinity, God the Son, a Divine Person. Jesus Christ is a single Person and not two; He is not schizophrenic. As proclaimed by the Tome of Leo in the Ecumenical Council of Chalcedon (451 A.D.), Jesus is a Divine Person with two natures: a divine nature and a human nature. Since Mary is truly the Mother of the Person, Jesus Christ and Jesus Christ is truly God, then it logically follows that Mary is the Mother of God. To deny this conclusion, one must deny either that Mary is truly the Mother of Christ or that Christ is truly God.

It must be rightfully understood that God willed to be born of a woman (Gal. 4:4), to be a Child, to suffer and die on the Cross. Nothing is impossible for God, except to sin. The one Jesus Christ is truly the "Son of God" (Luke 1:35; John 1:14,18) and the "Son of Mary" (Luke 2:34). The denial of Mary as the Mother of God is a subtle attack against the true divinity of Jesus Christ and His Incarnation: "the Word was God [John 1:1] ... And the Word became flesh, and dwelt among us" [John 1:14].

Israeli president discusses Middle East conflict, invites Pope to visit

Vatican City, Apr 30, 2013 / 09:00 am (CNA/EWTN News).- Israeli president Shimon Peres invited Pope Francis to visit the Holy Land during an April 30 meeting with him at the Vatican.

“I am expecting you in Jerusalem, not just me but the whole country of Israel,” Peres told the Pope in the Apostolic Palace.

He made his invitation in front of journalists after holding a private 30-minute meeting with the pontiff in which they discussed the ongoing conflicts in the Middle East.

The Vatican released a statement noting that “a speedy resumption of negotiations between Israelis and Palestinians is hoped for.”

“So that,” it added, “with the courageous decisions and availability of both sides as well as support from the international community, an agreement may be reached that respects the legitimate aspirations of the two peoples, thus decisively contributing to the peace and stability of the region.”

Pope Francis and President Peres also spent time discussing the “conflict that plagues Syria” and hoped for a political solution that “privileges the logic of reconciliation and dialogue,” the Vatican communiqué said.

The two heads of State also discussed relations between Israel and the Holy See, as well as relations between state authorities and local Catholic communities.

The Vatican stated that during their talks they appreciated “significant progress made by the Bilateral Working Commission, which is preparing an agreement regarding issues of common interest” and that a rapid conclusion is expected.

The Bilateral Working Commission includes fiscal negotiations, which were resumed in 2004.

Agreements still need to be reached on taxation and what degree of exemption Catholic churches and institutions have in Israel.

Other issues involve agreeing on which ecclesiastical properties and what level of immunity of expropriation they should enjoy.

After his meeting with Pope Francis, the Israeli president met with the Vatican’s Secretary of State, Cardinal Tarcisio Bertone, and with the Secretary for Relations with States, Archbishop Dominique Mamberti.

President Peres will be travelling on May 1 to Assisi, Italy, the hometown of the Pope’s patron saint, Francis of Assisi.

There he will be awarded with an “Honorary Citizenship for Peace” and with a key to the city.

Pope targets worldly Church as biggest threat

Vatican City, Apr 30, 2013 / 06:50 am (CNA/EWTN News).- The “greatest danger” for the Church is if it becomes worldly, since this prevents her from communicating the message of the Cross, Pope Francis said.

“When the Church becomes worldly, when she has the spirit of the world within herself … it is a weak Church, a defeated Church, unable to transmit the Gospel, the message of the Cross, the scandal of the Cross ... She cannot transmit this if she is worldly,” Pope Francis preached April 30 at his daily Mass.

Pope Francis based his homily on today’s Gospel reading from John 14 in which Jesus says to the disciples, ‘Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give it to you.’

Jesus also encouraged the disciples not to be afraid or troubled, because although he would soon go to the Father and that would involve “the ruler of the world” appearing to have power over him, he would return.

Pope Francis zeroed in on the moment of Christ’s Passion and how it related to the Church today, as he addressed staffers from the Administration of the Patrimony of the Apostolic See who were present at the Mass.

“The prince of the world comes but can do nothing against me: if we don’t want the prince of this world to take the Church into his hands, we must entrust it to the One who can defeat the prince of this world,” he stated.

And this raises the question: “do we pray for the Church, for the entire Church? For our brothers and sisters whom we do not know, everywhere in the world?” he asked.

It is “easy to pray for the grace of the Lord,” “to thank him” for blessings or to ask him for things we need, the Pope noted, but our prayers should also include our fellow believers who have “received the same Baptism.”

“Can we safeguard the Church, can we cure the Church, no? We do so with our work, but what’s most important is what the Lord does: he is the only one who can look into the face of evil and overcome it,” he said.

Pope Francis stressed that this way of praying is “also an act of faith” because it acknowledges that God alone can protect the Church and make it holy. If Catholics entrust the Church to Christ, including those who are experiencing “great tribulations and persecutions,” he “will give us … the peace that only He can give,” he said.

“May the Lord make us strong so we do not lose faith, so we do not lose hope.”

Offering the Church to the Lord, the Pope concluded, “will do us and the Church good. It will give us great peace (and although) it will not rid us of our tribulations, it will make us stronger in our sufferings.

Contraception, Lies and the Truth

by Sara Fox Peterson

I recently asked my husband why using NFP to avoid pregnancy sometimes feels so much less certain than using a contraceptive.

At first he said that it was because when a couple uses NFP they aren't actually doing anything to avoid pregnancy.

Then, a moment later, he said, "No, that's not right.  It's because with NFP we have to do everything."

"Huh?" I said.  But then I understood.

We are constantly told - by the media, by most of the medical profession, by the echo of our high school "health" teachers - that in order for sex to be "safe" we have to use some thing.  We can take a pill, erect a barrier, put ourselves under the surgeon's knife, but somehow we must "protect" ourselves.

Statistically, NFP is as effective as hormonal contraceptives like the pill and couples with truly serious reasons to avoid pregnancy almost never become pregnant while using NFP.  There is, however, a tremendous difference in the level of responsibility NFP users must assume.

There is a great temptation for couples who use contraception to tell themselves that conception cannot happen  that because they are being "responsible" and making use of a drug, device or surgical procedure, they absolutely cannot become pregnant.

This is, of course, a lie.

It is simply not possible for a man and woman who both have all of their reproductive organs to have sex without there being some chance, even if it is very small, that a child will be conceived.

One sometimes sees this temptation played out when a couple who has used NFP in the past comes to a point in their marriage where they unexpectedly have very serious reasons to avoid another pregnancy.  Rather than trust their knowledge of and experience with NFP, in their fear (and often at the urging of friends and medical professionals) these couples will sometimes abandon NFP and begin using a method of contraception with which it is actually far more likely that they will conceive unintentionally.

A couple who use NFP cannot cling to the (mistaken) belief that a drug or device will "protect" them from pregnancy.  The responsibility for avoiding conception is squarely on their shoulders . . . and in God's hands.

When a couple who uses NFP does experience an unplanned pregnancy, then, it is due to one of two things; either the couple themselves did not follow the rules for avoiding pregnancy or God "our Lord and creator" intervened.

Those who have obviously very grave reasons to avoid conception are extremely conscientious about learning and practicing NFP properly and true surprise pregnancies (those that occur despite a couple correctly understanding and faithfully following the rules for avoiding pregnancy) are so exceptionally rare that when they do occur they can honestly be considered little miracles.  With NFP, however, there is no third party - no device manufacturer, no pharmaceutical company, no surgeon - to take the blame.  There are only ourselves and our God and that is exactly as it should be.

The challenge for all of us, and particularly for those who are struggling to trust NFP, is to recognize the truth that God who is Lord of heaven and earth is also the Lord of our families and of our fertility and that His admonition to "fear not" applies here too.

Source: Sara Fox Peterson  www.catholicmom.org
Sara Fox Peterson is a stay-at-home mom and certified teacher of the Billings Ovulation Method of Natural Family Planning.  She holds a BS in biology and an MS in human physiology, both from Georgetown University

Chaste teens significantly less likely to be depressed

When compared to teens who are not sexually active, teenage boys and girls who are sexually active are significantly less likely to be happy and more likely to feel depressed. Also, when compared to teens who are not sexually active, teenage boys and girls who are sexually active are significantly more likely to attempt suicide.

According to a study written by The Heritage Foundation, teenage sexual activity is an issue of widespread national concern. Although teen sexual activity has declined in recent years, the overall rate is still high. In 1997, approximately 48 percent of American teenagers of high school age were or had been sexually active. Every day, about 8,000 teenagers in the United States become infected by a sexually transmitted disease. Overall, roughly one-quarter of the nation’s sexually active teens have been infected by a sexually transmitted disease. The problems of pregnancy and out-of-wedlock childbearing are also severe. In 2000, about 240,000 children were born to girls aged 18 or younger. Nearly all these teenage mothers were unmarried. These mothers and their children have an extremely high probability of long-term poverty and welfare dependence. Less widely known are the psychological and emotional problems associated with teenage sexual activity. This particular study examined the linkage between teenage sexual activity and emotional health. The researchers found that when compared to teens that are not sexually active, teenage boys and girls who are sexually active are significantly less likely to be happy and more likely to feel depressed. They also found that when compared to teens who are not sexually active, teenage boys and girls who are sexually active are significantly more likely to attempt suicide. In addition to its role in promoting teen pregnancy and the current epidemic of STDs, early sexual activity is a substantial factor in undermining the emotional well-being of American teenagers.

Church commemorates Pope St. Pius V on April 30

Denver, Colo., Apr 28, 2013 / 06:06 am (CNA).- A defender of Catholic doctrine and Christian civilization during the tumultuous 16th century, Pope Saint Pius V has his liturgical memorial on April 30.

The Dominican Pope is known for implementing the reforms of the Council of Trent, and for organizing the “Holy League” that defeated the Turkish naval fleet at the 1571 Battle of Lepanto.

Though St. Pius V’s pontificate was not extremely lengthy, it was a turning point in the history of the Church. In a 2004 letter for the fifth centenary of his predecessor’s birth, Blessed John Paul II mentioned some of St. Pius V’s groundbreaking achievements, which have continued to shape the liturgical and devotional life of the Christian West:

“He strove to apply faithfully the decrees of the Council of Trent: in the liturgical field, with the publication of the renewed (Tridentine) Roman Missal and the new Breviary; in the area of catechetics, by entrusting to parish priests in particular the ‘Catechism of the Council of Trent’; and as for theology, it was he who introduced St. Thomas' ‘Summa' into the universities,” Bl. John Paul II recalled in his tribute to St. Pius V.

“Conscious of the mission he had received from Christ the Good Shepherd, he devoted himself to tending the flock entrusted to him, encouraging daily recourse to prayer and making Marian devotion a priority. He contributed significantly to spreading it by giving strong encouragement to the practice of praying the Rosary, and he himself would recite the whole of it every day, despite his many exacting tasks.”

Born in the Italian region of Alessandria on Jan. 17, 1504, Michael Ghislieri belonged to a family that was living in poverty despite its distinguished past. He was taught by members of the Dominican Order, and chose to join them when he was only 14. After a decade of further study and formation, he became a priest in 1528.

In keeping with the Dominican tradition, Michael combined intense prayer and penance with intellectual rigor. He taught philosophy and theology, helped form new recruits, and led several houses of the order. His personal holiness and orthodoxy were acknowledged by Pope Paul IV, who made him a bishop in 1556 and a cardinal in 1557. During the same year he assumed leadership of the Holy Office of the Inquisition in Rome.

Against his own wishes, Michael was elected Pope in 1566. Taking the name of Pius V, the new Pope set an example for the faithful through acts of humility and charity. He visited the sick, washed the feet of the poor and suffering, and adopted a stripped-down lifestyle in accordance with his Dominican formation.

At the same time, the Pope had to address grave internal and external threats to the Church. Protestant forces had gained state support and were taking steps to extinguish the Catholic faith in some countries. Meanwhile, the Turks – having conquered Constantinople just over a century before – were advancing westward and asserting their sea power in the Mediterranean. Turkish forces attacked Malta in 1565, and conquered Cyprus in 1570.

While counteracting Protestantism through the Tridentine reforms, Pius also took steps to stop the spread of militant Islam. He brought together Spanish and Italian naval forces, together with those of the Papal States, under the command of Don John of Austria. Though seriously outnumbered, the “Holy League” won a dramatic and decisive battle against the Turkish fleet at Lepanto on Oct. 7, 1571.

Aided by the prayers of the Church, and particularly by the prayer of the Rosary, the Holy League’s victory secured Western Europe against Islamic domination for many centuries. Pius V instituted the feast of Our Lady of the Rosary, each year on Oct. 7, to commemorate the victory and give thanks for the Blessed Virgin Mary’s intercessory role.

During 1572 Pope Pius V was working toward a new and broader alliance of Western Christian powers against expansionist Islam. The Pope did not live to carry out this plan, however, as he became ill and died on May 1 of that year.

Pope St. Pius V was canonized in 1712. Since that time, only one other Pope – St. Pius X – has been declared a saint.

POPE'S PRAYER INTENTIONS FOR MAY

Vatican City, 29 April 2013 (VIS) – The Pope's general prayer intention for May is: "That administrators of justice may act always with integrity and right conscience."

His mission intention is: “That seminaries, especially those of mission Churches, may form pastors after the Heart of Christ, fully dedicated to proclaiming the Gospel.”

MASS AT ST. PETER'S: OPENING LIFE TO NEWNESS OF GOD

Vatican City, 28 April 2013 (VIS) – “Remain steadfast in the journey of faith, with firm hope in the Lord,” Pope Francis exhorted the 100,000 persons gathered this morning in St. Peter's Square to participate in the Mass at which he conferred the Sacrament of Confirmation on 44 faithful from around the world, representing the Church around the world. In his homily, the Bishop of Rome reflected on three themes: the newness of God, the trials of life, and firm hope in the Lord. Following is the full text of his homily.

The Newness of God

In the second reading, we listened to the beautiful vision of Saint John: new heavens and a new earth, and then the Holy City coming down from God. All is new, changed into good, beauty and truth; there are no more tears or mourning. This is the work of the Holy Spirit: he brings us the new things of God. He comes to us and makes all things new; he changes us. The Spirit changes us! And Saint John’s vision reminds us that all of us are journeying towards the heavenly Jerusalem, the ultimate newness which awaits us and all reality, the happy day when we will see the Lord’s face—that marvellous face, the most beautiful face of the Lord Jesus—and be with him for ever, in his love.

You see, the new things of God are not like the novelties of this world, all of which are temporary; they come and go, and we keep looking for more. The new things which God gives to our lives are lasting, not only in the future, when we will be with him, but today as well. God is even now making all things new; the Holy Spirit is truly transforming us, and through us he also wants to transform the world in which we live. Let us open the doors to the Spirit, let ourselves be guided by him, and allow God’s constant help to make us new men and women, inspired by the love of God which the Holy Spirit bestows on us! How beautiful it would be if each of you, every evening, could say: Today at school, at home, at work, guided by God, I showed a sign of love towards one of my friends, my parents, an older person! How beautiful!

The Trials of Life

A second thought. In the first reading Paul and Barnabas say that “we must undergo many trials if we are to enter the kingdom of God” (Acts 14:22). The journey of the Church, and our own personal journeys as Christians, are not always easy; they meet with difficulties and trials. To follow the Lord, to let his Spirit transform the shadowy parts of our lives, our ungodly ways of acting, and cleanse us of our sins, is to set out on a path with many obstacles, both in the world around us but also within us, in the heart. But difficulties and trials are part of the path that leads to God’s glory, just as they were for Jesus, who was glorified on the cross; we will always encounter them in life! Do not be discouraged! We have the power of the Holy Spirit to overcome these trials!

Firm Hope in the Lord

And here I come to my last point. It is an invitation which I make to you, young confirmandi, and to all present. Remain steadfast in the journey of faith, with firm hope in the Lord. This is the secret of our journey! He gives us the courage to swim against the tide. Pay attention, my young friends: to go against the current; this is good for the heart, but we need courage to swim against the tide. Jesus gives us this courage! There are no difficulties, trials or misunderstandings to fear, provided we remain united to God as branches to the vine, provided we do not lose our friendship with him, provided we make ever more room for him in our lives. This is especially so whenever we feel poor, weak and sinful, because God grants strength to our weakness, riches to our poverty, conversion and forgiveness to our sinfulness. The Lord is so rich in mercy: every time, if we go to him, he forgives us. Let us trust in God’s work! With him we can do great things; he will give us the joy of being his disciples, his witnesses. Commit yourselves to great ideals, to the most important things. We Christians were not chosen by the Lord for little things; push onwards toward the highest principles. Stake your lives on noble ideals, my dear young people!

The new things of God, the trials of life, remaining steadfast in the Lord. Dear friends, let us open wide the door of our lives to the new things of God which the Holy Spirit gives us. May he transform us, confirm us in our trials, strengthen our union with the Lord, our steadfastness in him: this is a true joy! So may it be.

How to Talk to an Atheist about Christianity

By Jason Anderson and Jennifer Fulwiler    

Once upon a time, not so long ago, atheism was the belief system that dared not speak its name. Even the most ardent skeptic paid lip service to faith, or at least to the blessings that mankind derived from it.

But that's not the case anymore. Atheism is a strong and growing influence in our culture. You can see it everywhere from the bestseller table at your local bookstore to the Darwin-mutated Jesus fish on the car in traffic in front of you. Atheists are comfortable declaring themselves atheists, comfortable promoting atheism, and comfortable decrying religion, which, according to some of the more prominent atheists, resides on the list of mankind's blessings somewhere between diphtheria and Nazism.

And now that we're encountering it more often, Christians sometimes find themselves ill-prepared to deal with this kind of muscular atheism. Especially for lifelong Christians, atheist arguments are so foreign that they don't know how to respond, and too often lapse into anger ("How dare you?!") or fear ("What if they're right?!"), neither of which does anyone any good, harming the Christian's witness and leaving the atheist firmly entrenched in his atheism.

If we're going to be encountering more atheists (and we are, whether at work or the laundromat or around our own dinner tables), we should be prepared to explain our beliefs in a way that resonates with people outside the faith. As a starting point, what follows is a list of dos and don'ts to keep in mind when you find yourself discussing religion with an atheist:

1. Don't be afraid to admit that you have faith. Christians frequently report that they've been in situations where the topic of why they believe comes up, and all they can say is that they have faith even though they've never done any major investigation. They often seem embarrassed by this defense. If you get caught in a conversation about why you believe and that's all you've got, don't be afraid to go with that. Articulate it as best you can. For example, you might explain that your faith is not just a story you tell yourself to feel good, or talk about what leads you to believe that you have a real relationship with Something outside of the material world.

2. Don't assume that your atheist friends are secretly angry at God or feel like something is missing in their lives. Work from the assumption that this person is an atheist because he or she simply has not seen any evidence that God exists.

3. Don't quote the Bible, but do know the Bible. The Bible is a source of great wisdom, but if you quote it to an atheist as an authority, it will be like your doctor explaining his diagnosis by reading a passage from a Harry Potter book. Don't just cough up Bible verses and expect that to convince anybody. There are reasons why the Bible says the things it says. Know the reasons behind them and be prepared to explain them.

4. Don't feel like you have to have all the answers right then and there. It is far better to simply say, "Great question! I don't know the answer to that, but I'd love to research it and get back to you," than to wade into territory that you're not familiar with.

5. Explain the big picture. Familiarize yourself with the historical case for Christianity, and offer a high-level explanation of what makes this religion's claims compelling -- that Jesus' life and death fulfilled ancient scriptures that all historians agree existed before His time; that almost all the apostles were martyred for their faith; that Christianity spread like wildfire despite horrendous persecution. Study the writings of the earliest Christians, who were defending Christianity in a pagan world that was largely hostile to their beliefs (sound familiar?).

6. Be logical. Don't deny the validity of logical, scientific thought out of hand. It's true that science doesn't have all the answers, but it does have some of them, and if you try to deny that, you risk pushing yourself into crackpot territory. As Pope Benedict XVI is always reminding us, the God in whom we believe is a God of reason. There is a long, learned history of rational arguments for Christianity, and if you can use them, you'll be speaking in terms that your atheist friend can understand. Get to know some of the great Christian philosophers and apologists. If you haven't read C. S. Lewis's Mere Christianity, what are you waiting for?

7. Realize that your only goal is to plant a seed. In these discussions we can sometimes get so focused on the details that we lose sight of the big picture. It's extremely unlikely that the person you're talking to is going to be completely convinced of the truth of Christianity in one conversation. Just defend Christianity the best you can, and remember that conversion is ultimately God's job, not yours.

8. Put yourself in your atheist friends' position. What if, for example, Christianity was false and Greek mythology was actually true? What would it take to convince you of that?

9. Don't use a lot of Christian catchphrases. Christians "give their hearts to Jesus" and "the Holy Spirit indwells us" and we take a "daily walk with Christ" so that we're "in the world but not of the world." All these phrases are meaningful and profound and instantly understandable for almost any Christian, but they don't mean anything to people who are outside the faith. It's hard to avoid them, because we're used to using them as shorthand for some very complex concepts. But you should be able to explain those concepts in plain terms anyway.

10. Pray. Don't make the mistake of relying solely on your own smarts when you have the Holy Spirit at your disposal. Pray for guidance for yourself and for a receptive heart within your atheist friend. You might be surprised at the effectiveness of this technique. It'll be good for you, too.

We're not encouraging anyone to go out and pick a fight -- no one ever got harangued into the family of God. But with a little mental preparation, when the time comes, you'll be ready to present the case for faith in terms that are familiar to your non-believing friends and family members. 

Jason Anderson is a web developer from Birmingham, Alabama, who posts thoughts on religion and culture at The Cynical Christian. Jennifer Fulwiler is a writer from Austin, Texas, who converted to Catholicism from lifelong atheism in 2007. She chronicles her ongoing conversion at ConversionDiary.com.

Success: More Teens Are Abstaining From Sex Than in the 90s

High school students are having less sex and fewer sexual partners today than in the early 90s.

The CDC released a study on Wednesday, citing that in 2007 less than 48 percent of high school students had ever engaged in sexual intercourse, compared to 1991 when over 54 percent of students were no longer virgins. The same study also shows that while African American students saw a decrease in sexual intercourse from 82 percent in 1991 to 66 percent in 2007, and white students saw a decrease from 50 percent to 44 percent over the past 16 years, Hispanic students saw only a 1 percent decrease (from 53 percent to 52 percent).

There seems to be a correlation between the lack of change in Hispanic student sex rates and HIV/AIDS education. In 1991, 82 percent of Hispanic high school students were educated about HIV/AIDS, and in 2007 that number had only risen to 85 percent. Comparatively, African American high school students’ HIV/AIDS education rose from 84 percent in 1991, to 90 percent in 2007, and white students saw an increase from 83 percent to 91 percent.

Additionally, those students who are having sexual intercourse are having a decreased number of sexual partners then they did in 1991 when19 percent of high school students admitted to having four or more sexual partners, compared to 2007, when that number dropped to 15 percent, according to the 2007 National Youth Risk Behavior Survey (YRBS). Of those students not practicing abstinence 62 percent said they used a condom during their last sexual encounter, compared to only 46 percent in 1991.¹
Nation′s High School Students Showing Overall Improvements in Health-Related Behaviors , 2007 National Youth Risk Behavior Survey, May 2007^.

Printed with permission from the Concerned Parents Report.

Religious views and parental attitudes reduce adolescent sex

Religion reduces the likelihood of adolescents engaging in early sex by shaping their attitudes and beliefs about sexual activity. Parents’ attitudes toward sex also influence their teens’ own attitudes toward sex, and indirectly, their teens’ behavior.

According to an article written by the National Institute of Child Health & Human Development (NICHD), teens (particularly girls) with strong religious views are less likely to have sex than are less religious teens. This is largely because their religious views lead them to view the consequences of having sex negatively. According to a recent analysis of the NICHD-funded Add Health Survey, religion reduces the likelihood of adolescents engaging in early sex by shaping their attitudes and beliefs about sexual activity. The study also found that parents’ religious beliefs and attitudes toward sex did not directly influence teens’ decisions to have sex. Rather, parents’ attitudes toward sex seemed to influence their teens’ own attitudes toward sex, and indirectly, their teens’ behavior. When teens do have sex, their beliefs about the consequences of sexual activity become more permissive (more positive or favorable) but their religious views do not change. In particular, adolescent girls who had sex reported that they were more positive about having sex in the future. However, the greatest predictor of whether teens would have sex, regardless of their religious views or attitudes, was whether or not they were dating.¹

¹Strong Religious Views Decrease Teens’ Likelihood of Having Sex,National Institute of Child Health & Human Development, April 2, 2003, pp. 1-3.

10 1/2 Reasons to be Chaste

The temptation to have sex before marriage is as old as marriage itself. More than 1,600 years ago, St. Augustine, grappling with his desires, cried out to God, "Give me chastity . . . but not yet!"

What is chastity? The word is often used to mean simply abstaining from sex, as if it were equivalent to celibacy. So it may be strange to learn that, according to the Catechism of the Catholic Church, "All Christ's faithful are called to lead a chaste life." If that meant total abstinence, how would there be any new Catholics? (After all, cloning is out of the question.)

The Church's stance makes sense only if one knows what chastity really is. A clue is in the rest of that sentence from the Catechism: "All Christ's faithful are called to lead a chaste life in keeping with their particular states of life." By "states of life," the Church means that there is unmarried chastity, and there is married chastity.

Part of chastity entails the proper ordering of sexual pleasure -- which means engaging in it only within marriage. But more than that, it is really a way to look at all of one's relationships so that they no longer become mere exchanges of commodities. It means experiencing others' presence -- not just what they do, but their existence itself -- as a gift. A spouse is a particularly special reminder of that most perfect gift of self made by Jesus Christ.

While sex can bring pleasure, the jury is still out on whether it can bring joy. Despite all the efforts of popular culture to promote sexual "liberation" as a route to personal fulfillment, many people remain deeply unsatisfied by relationships that offer sex without lifelong love and commitment.

The Catholic Church believes that true joy comes from God. In that light, the only way a sexual relationship can bring such joy is if it is undertaken by a man and woman who have brought God into it through the sacrament of marriage.

In sacramental marriage, spouses' commitment of unending love for one another emulates God's unending love for them. As a result, their temporal feelings of sexual gratification are transformed -- gaining a deep and fulfilling sense of spiritual permanence.

Beyond marital happiness, there are countless reasons why chastity is worth pursuing in the here and now. Here are ten and a half of them.

10. Find Joy in Unexpected Places

We live in a culture of entitlement. Movies, TV shows, and magazines exhort us to get the love that we "deserve."

But love defies the culture's rules. It is not something one can "get" in the sense of taking it for selfish reasons. When love is treated as an object to be consumed, it vanishes. "If a man offered for love all the wealth of his house, it would be utterly scorned" (Song 8:7).

Becoming chaste requires a conscious decision to change perspective. Relationships can no longer be viewed through the lens of entitlement: You accept the fact that love is too precious to be a thing "deserved."

That decision, known and made by all the saints, is essential to happiness in this life and the next. It is only after taking the focus off love, acquired or absent, that it is possible to see life's blessings as the gifts they are.

With this new vision, true love means being loved for who you are, not what you do. Likewise, there is a desire to share that same kind of unconditional love with others -- not only a spouse, but also anyone else -- because giving love is the only way to truly live.

After making the decision to be chaste, the effects of this change of perspective become immediately apparent. By taking the focus off yourself and what you might be lacking, you become more sensitive to others' needs. Joy is discovered in having the ability, with surprisingly little effort, to bring light into the lives of others.

Instead of attending social events only to be disappointed because there are no attractive or available singles to meet there, you go with the intention of looking beyond appearances and making new friends. People will be drawn to you because they will sense that you see and care about them as they are -- not as you would like them to be.

9. Experience True Freedom

The sexual revolutionaries of the 1960s and their ideological children tout the supposed joys of sexual "freedom." But how does the freedom to use or be used, to separate emotions from sex and sex from commitment, make one truly free?

As Americans, we have an inherent understanding of the necessary link between boundaries and freedom. Our Constitution, which guarantees our freedom, is valid precisely because we agree to abide by it and by the system of law and justice that upholds it. At its root is the recognition of the dignity of the human person -- the right to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.

In the same way, true sexual freedom can exist only when the dignity of the human person is recognized. That is impossible in an environment that upholds works like Eve Ensler's The Vagina Monologues, inviting people to reduce their self-image to their anatomy. Likewise, there is no dignity in a society that encourages touching another person's body but not allowing that person to touch your heart.

The Church's teachings on chastity enable us to discover, understand, and live out our liberty in Christ. G. K. Chesterton wrote nearly a century ago in Orthodoxy: "Catholic doctrine and discipline may be walls; but they are the walls of a playground. . . . We might fancy some children playing on the flat grassy top of some tall island in the sea. So long as there was a wall round the cliff's edge they could fling themselves into every frantic game and make the place the noisiest of nurseries. But the walls were knocked down, leaving the naked peril of the precipice. They did not fall over; but when their friends returned to them they were all huddled in terror in the center of the island; and their song had ceased."

8. Fornication Is a Mortal Sin

If there's a Heaven worth getting to, then it's impossible to ignore the fact that Jesus said that sex outside of marriage separates us from Him.

The Catechism defines sin in two categories, venial and mortal, according to their gravity, particularly how they affect charity -- that is, one's ability to love God and thereby truly love others. "Venial sin allows charity to subsist, even though it offends and wounds it," but "mortal sin destroys charity in the heart of man by a grave violation of God's law; it turns man away from God, who is his ultimate end and his beatitude, by preferring an inferior good to him" (1854-55).

"Mortal sin is a radical possibility of human freedom, as is love itself," the Catechism adds. "It results in the loss of charity and the privation of sanctifying grace, that is, of the state of grace. If it is not redeemed by repentance and God's forgiveness, it causes exclusion from Christ's kingdom and the eternal death of hell, for our freedom has the power to make choices for ever, with no turning back."

The Catechism specifically mentions fornication -- sex outside of marriage -- as a sin, and the Church has traditionally taught that it is a mortal sin. This teaching can be traced to the Sermon on the Mount, when Jesus said, "I say to you, everyone who looks at a woman with lust has already committed adultery with her in his heart" (Mt 9:28). If lustful looks are adulterous, how much worse is lustful physical contact?

St. Paul tells us that "fornicators" and other "unrighteous" "will not inherit thekingdom of God" (1 Cor 6:9-10). Willful sin of any kind, including fornication, deprives one of heaven.

A friend of mine offers another sobering thought: If you have sex outside of marriage, what you're really saying to your sex partner is, "I wish you hell."

7. Annoy Relatives

Are parents, grandparents, aunts, or uncles trying to fix you up? No more do you have to explain why you really don't want to take a chance on their nominee for Mr. or Miss Right. Just tell them you're chaste and you refuse to go out with anyone who believes in having sex before marriage. (However, if they respond that the person they have in mind is chaste too, you're busted.)

6. Be the Kind of Person You Would Want to Marry

Before deciding to spend the rest of your life with someone, you want that person to have a solid character. That includes possessing faith, integrity, trustworthiness, and self-control.

The fact is, like attracts like. A person with a rock-solid character is going to be attracted to someone who possesses those same qualities.

There is even a scientific study that suggests that chastity makes one more attractive. Psychologist Dr. Lucia F. O'Sullivan showed 110 male and 146 female unmarried heterosexual college undergrads photos of college students and gave them what she said was information about the students' sexual history. The undergrads were then asked to rate the attractiveness of the students in the photos.

"Both men and women depicted as having had sexual relations in casual, non-committed relationships were judged least favorably overall," writes Dr. Sullivan. "In contrast, men and women described as having sexual experience in committed relationships received the most favorable ratings, especially those described as having had few sexual partners."

5. No Foams, No Jellies, No Pills, No Shots, No Sponges, No Latex, No HIV, No STDs, No 'Honey, It's Just a Cold Sore'

Enough said.

4. Build True Intimacy, Not Forced or Premature Intimacy

Before taking marriage vows, the best way to practice for married love is by not having sex. That's because most of marriage is not having sex. It's a lesson that many couples learn too late.

Studies show that the top three reasons why couples divorce are communication problems, unhappiness, and incompatibility (see "Perceived Causes of Divorce," Journal of Marriage and the Family, February 1985). These problems often arise because couples have not learned, before their marriage, to communicate effectively and to make sacrifices for the good of the other. A major reason for this is often that they have skipped steps to intimacy, using sex to create a false bond while failing to make necessary efforts to deepen their relationship.

Part of the pseudo-intimacy that sex can bring is caused by body chemistry. Numerous scientific studies, some of which are cited in Dr. Miriam Grossman's Unprotected, have shown that the hormone oxytocin, which is released during sexual arousal, facilitates or fabricates a feeling of bonding, particularly in women.

Moreover, the nature of sex itself -- being a complete physical self-giving -- puts pressure on relationships where emotional intimacy has not been fully and deeply established.

For those who attempt to use sex as a shortcut to intimacy, the results are often painful. A study in the Journal of Sex Research found that college students in committed dating relationships often consented to unwanted sexual activity out of the belief that it was necessary for intimacy:

Approximately one quarter of the men and one half of the women who participated in this study reported consenting to unwanted sexual activity during a two-week period. This finding indicates that these experiences were not uncommon for our sample. . . . Participants typically reported consenting to unwanted sexual activity to satisfy a partner's needs, to promote relationship intimacy, and to avoid relationship tension. Diminished intimacy and/or relationship discord may be a consequence of violating such an implicit contract.

So, popular culture's ideal of sexual freedom, in practice, means making yourself available so that someone can emotionally pressure you into sex. Some freedom! As for whether such forced intimacy is likely to lead to a lasting marriage, see Reason No. 2.

3. Deepen Your Relationship with God

Different stages of life bring different priorities. "He who is unmarried cares for the things of the Lord -- how he may please the Lord," writes St. Paul to the Corinthians. "But he who is married cares about the things of the world -- how he may please his wife."

Likewise, Paul writes, "The unmarried woman cares about the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and in spirit. But she who is married cares about the things of the world -- how she may please her husband" (1 Cor 7:32-34).

The time that God gives for the single life is precious -- and not merely because you have more freedom to do what you want to do when you want to do it. As I wrote in The Thrill of the Chaste, it's precious because it provides a unique opportunity to bring all your spiritual graces into full flower -- and to do so in ways that will bear fruit for the rest of your life.

To be open to those spiritual graces, it helps to get prayered up: Pick up a new devotion from the veritable jewel box of prayers and spiritual aids approved by the Church -- like the Brown Scapular of Our Lady of Mount Carmel (a great inspiration for maintaining chastity). Go to Mass on a weekday and stay afterward for the rosary. Read the great spiritual writers of the Church -- like St. Teresa of Avila, St. Francis de Sales, and St. Thérèse of Lisieux.

Beyond prayer, giving your time to help others can make this period of life spiritually fruitful. Participate in parish volunteer days or join Catholic groups devoted to helping others. Open your eyes and ears; someone you know has an illness, is recovering from an addiction, or has suffered a recent tragedy.

It costs no money and often takes very little time to share God's love with someone in need, yet the rewards are incalculable. In years to come, you may be very thankful that, when you were unmarried and in good health, you used your time to learn holiness.

2. Dramatically Increase Your Odds of Having a Lasting Marriage

Numerous studies suggest that if a couple has had sex before marriage, the pair is far more likely to get divorced. The divorce rate for couples who live together before marriage is nearly twice that of couples who do not cohabitate (see "The changing character of stepfamilies," Demography 32; and "Cohabitation and Divorce in Canada," Journal of Marriage and the Family 57).

Likewise, research by Robert Rector and Kirk Johnson shows that experimenting with one or more sex partners doesn't prepare one for being able to maintain a committed relationship -- just the opposite, in fact. The Heritage Foundation researchers, analyzing the 1995 National Survey of Family Growth, found that for women 30 or older, those who were monogamous (only one sexual partner in a lifetime) were by far most likely to still be in a stable relationship (80 percent). Having sex with just one extra partner dropped that probability to 54 percent. Two extra partners brought it down to 44 percent.

As Heritage Foundation researcher Patrick Fagan noted, "Who would have thought that the price of sleeping with even one partner would lead to divorce for almost half of those who had only one extra tryst?"

1 1/2. Fornication is Still a Mortal Sin

And, the No. 1 reason to be chaste:

1. Learn How to Love Others the Way God Loves You

The hunger for love is so great that people often attach its name to emotions or impulses that are far inferior to the real thing.

As St. John wrote, God is love. In becoming man, He showed us how we are to love one another -- fully, completely, and sacrificially, with nothing held back.

The key to love is chastity, because it is only through chastity that we can learn to love one another as God loves us. That kind of love does not depend upon what another does for us. We love others because God gave us the ability to do so, and it is in doing so that we fulfill our destiny as His children."If we love one another, God remains in us, and his love is brought to perfection in us" (1 Jn 4:12).

This love, as we have seen, can be experienced only when it is accepted as a gift, not as what one deserves. The beauty of it is that, to fully experience the gift of another, one must become a gift. "Anyone who wishes to give love must also receive love as a gift," writes Pope Benedict XVI in Deus Caritas Est (God Is Love): "Certainly, as the Lord tells us, one can become a source from which rivers of living water flow (cf Jn 7:37-38). Yet to become such a source, one must constantly drink anew from the original source, which is Jesus Christ, from whose pierced heart flows the love of God (cf Jn 19:34)."

Loving others as God loves them requires truth and integrity -- qualities that are absent in sex outside of marriage.

In non-marital sex, your body says, "I give myself to you completely," while your heart says, "nope," "maybe," or "hope so." The dichotomy between what is done and what is felt is spiritually damaging, because what you do with your body affects your soul.

"The body, and it alone, is capable of making visible what is invisible: the spiritual and the divine," John Paul II says in the Theology of the Body. "It was created to transfer into the visible reality of the world the mystery hidden since time immemorial in God, and thus be a sign of it."

That mystery has its source in the ultimate union -- that of God and His Church in heaven. To the extent that you reflect God's love, your body and soul are at heaven's leading edge.

Living chastely means recognizing your true residence and living as though you are already there. The size of your home is determined by the size of your heart. As countless saints have discovered, it is truly living large.

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Dawn Eden is the director of the Cardinal Newman Society's Love and Responsibility Program and is author of The Thrill of the Chaste: Finding Fulfillment While Keeping Your Clothes On (Thomas Nelson, 2006). Visit the Cardinal Newman Society online at http://www.cardinalnewmansociety.org and The Thrill of the Chaste Web site at http://www.thrillofthechaste.com .